EFT

EFT (Emotion Focused Therapy)

EFT adopts the premise that emotional key to identity and well-being. For this reason, the emotional experience of individuals, particularly in a relationship, should be prioritised ahead of any other value system, such as who is more correct. This will allow each person to feel valid and understood and accepted as a person. With a calm and peaceful feeling, all other matters can be better discussed and negotiated.

If we do not prioritise the emotions of the other and instead prioritise another value, such as who is more correct, the other will feel unheard, unaccepted and invalidated. This will then heighten the other’s urgency and emotions as that person strives to be validated. In this heightened emotional state, any chance of a reasonable and rational discussion will be near impossible to achieve.

In accordance with this principle, the therapist will regularly pause the discussion to check-in and ask each individual how they are feeling. This process allows the individuals to pause and reflect on how the conversation is being experienced by the other and where the conversation is likely headed.